Free Ranged Chickens

Dear Hunters of WoW,

Please stop getting us killed.

Seriously. There seems to be some universal truths to the game that you guys aren't necessarily getting. (I'll be the first to admit that there are a few exceptions. Believe it or not, some conscientious hunters are out there that keep an eye on their surroundings and don't have some insidious, overarching tendency to wipe the party intermingled within their psyche, but they're few and far between). I'm going to offer up one troll's opinion, and it'll likely make some of you upset. I'm fine with this. The reason is, you've upset me first. Whereas I'm being deliberate, the injuries that you oft inflict on groups appears to come out of a sense of carelessness, disregard for group dynamics, and an overall sense of recklessness that borders on class malpractice. While I will say that there are some Pods that this razing pertains to, specifically, throughout the course of my WoW career, it often holds true, no matter what guild, faction, or server is in question. This isn't, of course, to say that I've never gotten a group killed. I have plenty of times. I will continue to do so, and in the east tomorrow morning, the sun will rise in spite of me. What I have noticed, though, is that whenver a hunter does something stupid and gets a group wiped, rarely will they say something about it, and adding insult to injury, they manage to avoid dying and the rest of the raid is made to pay for their transgressions.

Some thoughts:

• In raid scenarios, you are NOT necessarily a primary DPS class. It's an ugly truth, and I'm not disputing the fact that well-geared hunters can dish out insane amounts of damage. Lord knows that warriors certainly aren't there for those reasons. What I am concerning myself with at the moment is the notion that somebody brings hunters along in a party as their #1 source for damage. It ain't true. Nobody takes a hunter to UBRS to shell things. They do it to kite Drakkisath. Freeze traps. Pulling. Disengage/Feign Death. Viper Sting. These are the things that Blizzard gave you that enable you to stand out from a crowd and be unique. If you notice, these remarkable abilities aren't very high in your warped bag of tricks when it comes to nuking something. It's okay. It is this skillset that makes you desirable to a group. Maximize your advantages that you have over other classes.
  

• Tyler Durden was right. I've said it a million times in Molten Core. It bears repeating, evidently, because of some people not listening. You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake. "DPS OFF" means exactly that. How effing hard is that to wrap your mind around??? Pop quiz: If the tank engages a target, and the raid leader immediately flashes the "DPS OFF" Raid Warning, what *might* that mean? If you answered "Don't fracking touch your auto-shot until 'DPS ON,' you are absolutely correct. If your default response was anything but that, thanks for playing and call back. We're looking for caller #15. Honestly. I don't get it. I don't care if it IS white damage. It's still DAMAGE. All you do is prolong the DPS call, at that point. You're not speeding anything up. You want to help? Wanna do your part to keep the pace up? Do what the frack your raid leader tells you to do, when they tell you to do it. The market for wheel reinvention is dead. You want to develop something unique? How about a coping mechanism? Deal.
  

• Quality time. This is the spiritual sibling to the DPS on call at the start of a fight, but this is in the heat of battle. One of your tanks at some point might die. This is a universal truth, and by and large cannot be avoided. It's an unfortunate reality. The good news is that you probably have more, ready and willing to fill the void left by their fallen brethern. They're at a bit of a disadvantage to the dearly departed, though. They haven't had the luxury of building up aggro like the Main Tank did. This being the case, they've got to claw their way to the top of the aggro list. It hardly does any good to try to accomplish this while the rogues, mages, warlocks, and yes you, hunters, are blasting the everliving hell out of this particular mob. The raid leader again will carry on with the DPS OFF. Please pay attention to this one, too. As soon as the new tank has sufficient aggro, you are more than welcome to continue shooting whatever it may be. Until then, however, the new warrior has some work to do with the target.
  

• Live by the sword. Occasionally, things will get hairy. That's okay. Chances are, the group of folks you're raiding with is pro enough to handle it and make lemonade out of the lemons handed to it from a bad pull. Here's the thing I rarely see hunters do, though. There are times when it's not only okay to use your melee weapons, but you really ought to. I want the mob dead as much, if not more than you. I'm the one getting beaten on. The thing is, this fight might be in such close quarters that there might not necessarily be safe room enough for you to get into ranged position. Blizzard gave you the enviable ability to dual wield, just like 2 other classes. Maybe you like a 2H weapon. In the name of all that's dear, just USE it.
  

• Stand in the place where you live. Here's the danger when things get ugly and in an admirable effort to help the situation as much as possible, you try to get in position to do your best damage: ranged. I've seen it over and over again, you stop paying attention to your surroundings. There is this inexplicable hunter tendency to go running off to the sides to get ranged distance, and the darnest thing is out there: DEATH. This is the one thing that pisses me off more than any other. WTF is so unique about you that you can't run back where the healers, mages and warlocks are? There are only 2 safe locations in a fight where you aren't going to accidently wander into the aggro radius of another mob and bring them into a fight. One is right on top of where the tank is. (See above). The other is with the ranged DPS casters. "Mother of God, what heresy is THIS"??? It's what we politely like to refer to as the truth. Blizzard is not going to issue a GM into your instance looking for the perfect hunter action shot. Don't hold your breath. I wouldn't even bitch if it weren't for the fact that I've seen an infinite number of hunters back up into an infinite number of mobs an infinite number of times, bringing in certain death to the rest of the party from when they were off on their own, trying to get far enough away to use their gun/bow. Cut that shit out. If you want distance, the "S" key is your best friend. Back that thang up. Don't go all maverick off on your own. If you do, I hope your healers are smart enough to let you die and think about what stupidity you wrought upon yourself, rather than healing you and bringing them into the group for sure.

I hate that all of this comes as harshly as it does, but I've had my fill of mongoloid hunters that drag certain doom upon the raid because of some avoidable thing that they did. I've had it.